The North Swole - Women's T-Shirt Size:XL a curly black mustache tucked

a curly black mustache tucked beneath the hat brim

A gold ribbon banner displays "1985" in dark lettering

A baseball illustration marked "ESTD" sits beside bold block text reading "1914

Somewhere a sign painter got paid in free skate passes and honestly came out ahead

so building a roller rink there is honestly the least unhinged civic decision on record

The North Swole - Women's T-Shirt Size:XL a curly black mustache tuckedSanta skipping cookies for chicken breast six times a day explains why nobody ever sees him between December 26th and November 30th. Eleven months of bulk season, one night of cardio. The Details: Arched white Gothic text reads "North Swole" above a comic book style illustration of a muscular, shirtless Santa Claus with arms crossed in a bodybuilder pose. Santa wears a red hat with white trim and red pants cinched by a black belt with a golden buckle.