President Teddy Boozevelt - Unisex Tank Top Size:2XL Screwdrivers sitting behind caution tape

Screwdrivers sitting behind caution tape like they're being formally exonerated of identity theft

Forty bucks

Five words doing more threat assessment than an entire HR department

and white clouds

Large alternating black and white block letters below read "WWSD

President Teddy Boozevelt - Unisex Tank Top Size:2XL Screwdrivers sitting behind caution tapeTeddy Roosevelt already looked like a guy two bourbons into explaining why he could beat up every other president. Slapping "Boozevelt" on him barely counts as a joke, it's just a historically accurate campaign poster. The Details: A digital illustration depicts Teddy Roosevelt in round glasses, walrus mustache, blue suit, red vest, and red bow tie, hoisting a glass of amber liquid. White serif text reads "PRESIDENT" above large bold white text